So this is it, the big leagues. Mere hours ago I put the finishing touches on my Match.com profile and it seems that my profile is devoid of adult content or potentially harmful material and was put on the fast track to approval. Hello internet dating scene, I have arrived.
The first half, which I’ll chronicle in this entry, is the “About Me” section. I’ll cover the “About Me” section in this posting and then post a separate “About My Date” section.
Making the profile was an interesting venture, actually. I entered my email address (I made a generic gmail one!), my birthday, let it know that I am a woman seeking a man, and then chose a username.
So many people have talked about the importance of the dating site screen name. I was nervous to pick. First and foremost, I didn’t want a user name that I have ever used online (There are only three that I have used since 1997!), one that could be traced to where I work, or one that might lead back to this blog. So I went with something simple but random. I left out the number 69, which seems to be something most people can’t really refrain from on dating sites, and I didn’t use the words girl, gurl, or baby. I figure I’m probably ahead of the game on this one.
Now that I’ve selected a username comes the big fun–actual questions! First off, what brings me here today? There’s no option that says “I’m blogging and someone offered to let me try this for free!” so I just answered “no answer” on this one. Sorry, whoever does the research and uses this data!
I begin page one of the basics with some excitement. Simple questions. My relationship status? Never married. Thanks for the reminder. I’m female, again. And then the big question…the age range of my potential mate?
I fully believe that the age of my potential dates will factor in to how I respond to them in a major, major way. Too young? What will we talk about (and will I know them from my job? EEK!)? Too old and I tend to feel weird. I debated for a long time and finally I made my choice. I’m willing to date someone between the ages of 25 and 35. I checked with a few friends and they thought this seemed like a plausible range for me. First and foremost, though it is possible to run in to someone I’ve met at my job, it becomes less likely after the age of 24, the age that many students graduate from college. Also, I have this (whackjob?) theory that though I am close in age-proximity with those who are still pursuing undergraduate degrees straight from high school, we have different frames-of-reference on life, jobs, and free time. Three years does not seem like a huge gap, but I cannot be taken to a frat party on a Friday night (
more than once or twice!).
35 is really my max in age, and that serves two purposes. One, it’s less than ten year’s difference, which seems like a good round number to stop with, and second, they won’t remember much before I was born–i.e. the years before 1984. And as a friend pointed out–let’s be honest here folks–The Blonde’s last two ‘crushes’ have been over 35. Age has definitely factored in the ‘reasons this cannot work’. So I am definitely attracted to the maturity and stability that comes with someone older than I am, but not too much older. And I just spent way too much time justifying my age choice. Moving on..
I spent less time considering the distance I am willing to travel for the match of a lifetime–I included my city and my hometown, which happens to be about an hour away from me. I figure this gives me an opportunity to meet people outside my current city and maybe see some new things. Oh, and it also lets me see if anyone I went to high school with is on Match.com. Sorry.
Match also sneaks a little box in at the bottom of that page that says “I only want to see matches with photos”. I definitely clicked that. Don’t let it pass you by. I could have missed it if I hadn’t been pouring over the age question for so long.
Page two, more basics. Where did I grow up? I wonder what this is used for? And what’s my sign? I don’t mind telling, it’s libra. But again, how will this factor into my Match.com experience? Very interesting.
We move on to appearance. Just some general questions. How tall am I? Despite my driver’s license statement of 6 feet, 3 inches, I am just a mere 5 feet, 6 inches. That’s a good woman size, right? Not too short, but not so tall I’ll tower over most men I meet. Not that towering over men is a bad thing.
What’s my body type? The options are interesting. Slender…not since…ever. About average…that sounds right, but what is average? Athletic and toned…that’s a goal but not a reality yet. Heavyset…I wouldn’t say that, especially not since I slimmed down almost 100 pounds. A few extra pounds…what? Stocky…makes me think of George Costanza. Next. Big and beautiful…seems like a Craigslist answer of someone bigger than me. Curvy..hmm! Full figured…seems like an ad for Lane Bryant, which is cool, but probably not me anymore.
After much debate, I went with curvy. I am willing to go back and change this, should any man out there send me a message giving me a good reason why curvy isn’t a descriptive word that would turn a man on (I didn’t say every man, I said a man). I gave a couple of colleagues all the options, as read above, and asked them to independently choose a word to describe me for a dating site–keeping in mind that I wanted to be honest and would not feel offended at any choice. All three settled on curvy. If they’d call me curvy, then it’s probably a reality. Gosh, this is stressful and requires more votes than any piece of legislation I ever studied in college.
What’s my eye color? Blue. And finally, the question of the day, what I’ve been waiting for this entire time. What is your hair color? Blonde! Blonde! Let me shout it from the mountaintops, I AM BLONDE!
Okay sorry..moving on. The next category in the “about me” section is a category of “What sort of sports and exercise do you enjoy?” Several check boxes are on this page, allowing you to pick from things like “basketball” “football” “autoracing”. At first I was intimidated, thinking that I didn’t actually participate in any of these sports and I would be a total loser. But…then I realized…do that many people really participate in auto racing? Probably not…so this section is definitely more about what you enjoy either playing OR watching..not just exclusively participating in. Take liberties, because I did!
On that same page are two open boxes with 250 character limits. Here, you free-write about your favorite places and what you do in your free time. The trick is to fit your personality in the writing as well as answer the questions…and it’s pretty close to sending a tweet with the low character limit. This took me awhile. I am too verbose at times. Have fun with it though. I’ve found since filling out this profile that my favorite things to read are the 250 character ‘shorts’. The sad part is that these boxes are optional. Fill these out! PLEASE!
The Interests section continues with the classic “What kind of movies do you like?” questions. The genres are cleverly labeled with photos to help you in case you don’t understand, I guess. I don’t take this section very seriously…mostly because movies are pretty low on my list of “things I’d like to do”. Comedy, drama, documentary. I like what I like? Hmm.
Lifestyle page is next. Do you smoke? Never. Do you drink? This one is tricky. I like Match.com’s options…rather than having to answer the number of drinks per week, you can simply answer “moderately” or “socially” rather than the arbitrary number of drinks per week. I think this is a more honest look. I drink socially but would tell you I drink 0-1 drinks per week, which sometimes is accurate and sometimes isn’t. There’s another little box at the bottom of the lifestyles page asking for 250 characters. It’s an opportunity to tell more about yourself…the suggestion is to tell more about your job. I look at this less than the other 250 character boxes. Final question, again could have missed it..easy answer. “No.” Second page of lifestyle asks my annual income. I left it blank…that seemed unnecessary to me. Next box asks for pets you like, pets you have, and pets you have no preference on. Weird, weird, weird. I never considered this in dating. I like regular pets, nothing really exotic, not birds really. Ugh!
Background and Values category is up next. My ethnicity seems so boring, but I answer white/Caucasian and leave the 250 character box empty…what is there to say about that, really? Someone with a different or multi-ethnic background definitely might have a better answer in 250 characters. Religion comes next, and that’s a tough one for me. I was raised…nothing, really. My family is full of non-practicing Methodists, I went to Catholic school for a bit, I minored in Religious Studies, and yet I am just about the least knowledgeable Christian I can think of. Still, I would describe myself as a spiritual person. I select Christian/Protestant since technically I’m not Catholic. Another 250 character box I left blank, but I’m considering going back and putting the previous sentence in about the Methodist family, Catholic school, etc.
Page 2 of Background and Values and I am wearing even more thin. This covers languages you speak (I don’t know if my limited French counts, so I say no), Politics (I put middle of the road, I don’t want to turn anyone off since I’m seriously so laid back about political views of others!), and education. I’m a little self-conscious about just having a Bachelor of Arts in a town full of grad students my age.
THE FINAL ABOUT ME SECTION ARRIVES! And the “Get to Know Me” section is actually interesting. It asks your birth order (Only child, SURPRISE!)…what charities you gravitate towards, which comedian you find funniest (ugh, Match.com, get better options here! Jim Carrey or Chris Rock shouldn’t be a choice for me…), how you’d spend a big bonus, and what you’d do at a party if you knew no one. I actually like these sorts of questions and there were more to answer like this. I think these give a better view of what people value and what they are like. The basics are good information, but these questions to me answer what you like not what you are like. And I find that much, much more interesting.
Okay, I’ve droned on enough about myself. Next Match.com post will cover the “About My Date” section, which may be more interesting to you.