Q&A Tuesday

What perfume do you wear? Do you think scent has a lot to do with attraction?

I wear two different perfumes—Unconditional Love by Philosophy and Viva La Juicy by Juicy Couture.  Viva is for when I’m feeling fun and funky, and Unconditional Love is for when I am feeling pretty and classic.  I wear perfume every day.  I use unscented deodorant and shaving lotion because I like to ensure that my perfume is the only scent I carry.  My grandmother and mother wear another scent by Philosophy and frequently get comments on how great they smell, but I have only been complimented one time, by one person, on my perfume choice, and it still makes my day to remember it!

I think scent can be attractive.  Who hasn’t brushed past someone and said “Oh my GOSH he/she smells UH-MA-ZING!”.  However, I don’t think I’ve ever smelled someone and subsequently become attracted to them for the long term.  It’s just a pleasant side item.  Mostly, for me, scent is tied to memory.  Smelling certain cologne, air freshener, or other scents can instantly take me back 5, 10, 15 years.  It is both a comfort and a curse, because scent can make me instantly happy, sad, or both.  It’s not limited to perfumes.  Sometimes I smell buildings where I work that take me back to an exam I took in college, nearly causing anxiety attacks as I walk around!

I really like Burberry cologne on men.  My first boyfriend wore Eternity and I will forever remember that scent.  I can recall it in my mind and trick myself into smelling it!

What do you first notice about a man when you meet him?

Great question.  Mostly, I don’t know.  Some girls notice height, hair, shoes (I’m looking at you, LM!).  I think if I notice anything physical about someone, it’s probably their mouth/teeth.  I am not a stickler for perfectly straight teeth.  However, I like to look at teeth.  I blame years of braces and dentist visits for this.  I like to see someone smiling, showing their teeth.  I think when you smile and show teeth you’ve let go on ‘control’ and are having a good time.

What is the longest you have “talked” to someone? Both really talking and pursuit.

This question takes me back to high school when ‘talking’ meant dating.  Is that what you mean?  Perhaps you mean the longest I’ve ever been interested in someone before it went somewhere or I gave up? Here’s a secret I’ll tell you.  I have never been turned down by someone I am chasing, and I never give up.  Ever.

My life is full of people I chase endlessly, I think.  For some reason, I’m willing to put effort into pursuit of a crush. I intend to get what I want, so if that takes 6 months, so be it.  I chase The Friend for four months before anything ever happened.  And spent the next two years trying to get him firmly in my grasp even after I got what I ‘wanted’.  The longest I’ve talked to someone without anything happening is nearly two and a half years.  But believe me, it wasn’t for lack of trying to make something happen. Somehow, I still believe I’ll get what I want one day.

Is there a lesson to be learned here?  How long should one ‘talk’ to an interest before giving up? Is there a point of no return—where you can never start over as friends but will never be a couple? You tell me.  I’m still chasing..

Thoughts on online dating? Should a relationship be started in person or online?

This is a question for a post all it’s on, really.  But I will give you a short and sweet answer that sort of skirts the question and promise to delve into this subject in depth on this blog in the near future.

I think there is a difference between meeting someone online and going on a dating site in order to meet someone.  I am interested in meeting someone online in a setting of common interest and fellowship—chatting, message boards, hey this blog (just kidding, no applications please.).  I think that’s an awesome and viable way to meet people, especially for me, someone who’s looking for a partner with common interests and personality.  My uncle met his wife online way back in the day before people were meeting online, and they’ve been happily married for a long, long time.

I think online dating is fabulous for some people.  Someone I know is in a great relationship that was started on a dating site.  I’m very jealous of the success this person had! However, I don’t feel up to trying it just yet.  The short answer for why is that I am fairly creeped out by the pictures I’ve seen on dating sites.  I will never ever want to message you if your default picture is you with your shirt off.  The long answer has something to do with the fact that I still don’t know what the heck I’m looking for, so how on earth could I find it on an online dating site? I feel like I’d be looking for a needle in a haystack but I didn’t really have a description of the needle in the first place.

More next week.

xoxo The Blonde.


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